Some honest Sunday thoughts from Instagram tonight: 

I don’t have spiritual experiences very often. When I pray, I often feel like I’m talking to myself. Many times I’ll sit there in silence ACHING to hear something in return. Maybe there’s a secret ear I don’t have open? I don’t know. Most of the time I don’t feel super close to God and often question if He even notices or cares about me. Looking around at church, it’s easy to assume that everyone is super spiritually in tune and “inspired” in every moment of their lives, bosom burning and all....and I feel like I’ve always been spiritually broken, like some sensor in my soul is missing or something, no matter how hard I try to fix myself.

BUT! The few times I’ve gotten answers, felt God’s presence, heard a voice in return in prayers - those few experiences have been INDELIBLE. I recently asked God if I should go forward with a course of action - He gave me a VERY firm “No” and told me “everything would work out.” I trusted that answer and while I had to wait a bit, my problem was eventually solved as He said it would be. God doesn’t talk to me often, but He always delivers. ❤️

So if you’re anything like me and feel like something might be broken spiritually, you’re not alone! Hold on to the experiences you DO have. He is there, He is listening. Don’t feel ashamed or broken because you aren’t having the same experiences as everyone else. Our relationships with God aren’t a race or comparison game. You aren’t broken - we all communicate with God differently and I’m still trying to explore how that works for me. 🙏🏻